Guest Blogger: Nadia Nair

Nadia Nair

Intro: Elena Katrina

Crazy crazy crazy times… they certainly are reflecting. Mars is in retrograde, summer is burning and I am writing a blog post for the first time in my life. I’m not an influencer, but I am under the influence… lol no but I might be. I’ve just realised that’s such a Gothenburg way of joking. I am from the west coast and have moved around a lot over the years but I chose to come back to my hometown Gothenburg in Sweden. I feel like this is tying together pretty well, there’s too much to write about and I tend to get carried away, so forgive me for jumping back and forth a lot, I still have no clue what to write about, and I’m placing trust on my typing.
I feel like this post is leading to Way Out West, a festival in my hometown where I am set to play next month. You could say it’s my first time… apart from that one time when I was trying to make it there 5 years ago. I was at a party for influencers (omg it is tying together), it was like going to Ibiza but it was midday in Gothenburg. It was one of the pre-parties for Way Out West. My ex-manager told me it was an acoustic gig for a bunch of bloggers. So I brought my guitar and my guitarist, but it turned out to be Ibiza 2.0 and they wanted electro-pop. I went up and did my thing, with anxiety and pain rushing through my body, probably the pain coming from anxiety. I had to sing through a shitty mic, trying to be part of the life of the party spirit when I wasn’t, my mic was making all sorts of noises due to it being a shitty mic and due to technical failures. A couple hours later I was downing milk shots with a friend to console myself, fell on the DJ’s decks, got carried out by the bouncers, my uncle was there (?!) somehow picking my puking ass up with his car and I woke up at 7pm in my cousin’s room (this was apparently a day party).
That wasn’t my first memory of Way Out West. My first memory was going to the actual first every Way Out West festival. It was big for my hometown, we’d never had so many big artists in our town all at once. Kanye West had flown in on a helicopter apparently, I finally got to see my all-time favourite Erykah Badu perform, Iggy Pop too… and the list of too-good acts continued. My most precious and vivid memory was seeing Prince the second time I attended Way Out West. I’m not a festival person by the way, but I will put aside my personality traits for Way Out West because it is unlike any other festival. I probably am saying that because it’s in my town. But when Prince performed it was as if I was in another dimension and I remember thinking I’m never going to be able to explain how this feels, not even to my dad who I wanted so desperately to come and see Prince with me. And now that memory ties into the feeling of never being able to see him again. How purple confetti on my iPhone 3 could feel with no sound on it. Just pictures of that feeling. I remember saying I had never cried during a live performance before and I remembered the memory of me saying that while I was crying during his performance. Anyway… the rest is kept holy for me.
I am to perform at Way Out West this time… I’m not on the biggest stage, I’m far from the biggest artist there but people keep asking me how it feels and I’ve had to search for an answer because it doesn’t come naturally to me to get direct emotions about it. I feel warm inside thinking about it. I feel thankful and weird. I know some of my friends and family will be there and that makes me happy the most, because when I perform all over the place my friends and family don’t always get a chance to come along and see me. My closest make me happy, they ground me, centre me and fulfil me. They make me question myself less and choose bravery over doubt. My hometown holds them. And for me, even though Way Out West has become bigger and more commercial, drawing more and more attention to it, it will always be a party in my small little west coast town where I grew up and went through my most heartbreaking and ground-breaking changes as a girl. This brown mixed girl that is almost 30 and about to sing new songs which she loves to sing live finally… I don’t know whether to compare it to my years of self-doubt or to the fact that I am ever-evolving. It feels a way, you tell me. I love how we are all made up of stories, and that they are different and sit in our spines holding us up throughout the day. My joy lies in the fact that mine are as real as yours, and that I have come to the times of sharing and being equal with you. We get to vibrate on another frequency together and I get to be on stage as myself.

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  • About Popped Music

    Popped Music has been going since Feb 2010.

    All articles written by Elena Katrina unless otherwise stated.

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